Tips for Non Jews attending a Passover Seder

I’ve been invited to a seder but Im not Jewish – what do I need to know

That’s awesome! Getting invited to a Passover seder is a special experience—rich in tradition, food, and storytelling. You don’t have to be Jewish to appreciate it or to participate meaningfully. Here’s a quick guide to help you feel comfortable and know what to expect:

The Basics

What’s a Seder?
“Seder” means “order” in Hebrew. It’s a ceremonial dinner steeped oin tradtions and special customs held on the first (and sometimes second) night of Passover, telling the story of the Israelites’ exodus from Egypt. It follows a specific sequence from a book called the Haggadah.

How Long Is It?
Depends on the host, but it can be anywhere from 1.5 to 4+ hours.  So be prepared. The more religious the longer it is. Some famikies only read the text of the book, and others discuss many aspects of the text. You may be called on to read in your language. Try and get hold of the book at a book a book store or on the internet and familiarize yourself.  Preparation allows you to fit in more comfortabley.

What to Expect

Ceremony First, Then Dinner
There’s a lot of reading, singing, blessings, and symbolic food before the main meal. You’ll eat small bites (like parsley dipped in salt water, bitter herbs, etc.) early on, but don’t expect dinner until later in the evening.

Reading the Haggadah
Everyone usually takes turns reading from the Haggadah. You can follow along or just listen. No pressure—many seders are informal and inclusive.

Four Cups of Wine
You’ll drink four small cups of wine (or grape juice) throughout the seder. These represent different stages of freedom. Your host will guide you when it’s time to drink.

The Seder Plate is placed in the center of the table
This centerpiece includes symbolic foods:

• Matzah (unleavened bread) represents the bread the children of Israel baked in haste and didn’t not wait to rise.
• Maror (bitter herbs, like horseradish) represents the bitter times the children  of Israel experienced
• Charoset (sweet mix of apples, nuts, wine) represents the brick and mortar to build the pyramids
• Karpas (greens like parsley)
• Z’roa (shank bone) represents the sacrificial lamb
• Beitzah (egg) represents fertility

Questions Are Encouraged
The whole night is based around asking questions—especially “Why is this night different from all other nights?”  This is a song that the youngest in the family sings or recite. Don’t be shy if you’re curious about anything. The focus is on including children  and encouraging questions – the best way to learn. So any questions you have will be welcomed. Never feel shy at a Jewish table or meal

Etiquette Tips

Ask If You Can Bring Something
How about a gift form Barbara Shaw Gifts – the best thing to bring!! Many hosts will appreciate a bottle of wine (kosher). Flowers are always a safe bet too.

Dress Nicely
Think “holiday dinner” or “smart casual” unless told otherwise.

Be Open
It’s okay to ask what things mean or why they’re done. Most Jews love explaining traditions to guests.

Avoid Leavened Products
During Passover, Jews avoid leavened bread (like regular bread, pasta, pastries). Don’t bring a baguette! Its best not to bring food